Alberta gets the job done for Ontario

Vincent J. Curtis

28 Nov 21 

The news from Lotusland and from cowboy country is a study in contrasts.  In B.C., they drained a lake and built a town on the lakebed, and their descendants act dismayed when nature comes along and refills it.  Lotusland highways are built through scenic mountain passes, but the hippies seem surprised at mudslides and washouts.  This could add up to the fruits from Lotusland not making it to Ontario this year.

The news from Alberta is that Ontarians will be warm and well fed this winter.  Oil and gas workers brave temperatures as low as -50℃ to keep the natural gas and oil flowing.  When a well runs dry, the roughnecks don’t look at the hole and wonder how climate change could have done that.  They drill a new well, and Ontarians will be warm in their natural gas heated homes and have the electrical power to watch The Bachelorette on TV.

Oil workers unfailingly mine tarsand and convert it into fuel, enabling Alberta food to be trucked into Ontario’s supermarkets.  Ontarians won’t go hungry.  The cowboys make sure Ontario has a year round supply of tasty beef.  Alberta cattle may be flatulent and they don’t get critical race theory or that gender is a social construct, but they reproduce without caring what pronoun you call them by.

The hippies are in a heap of trouble, but the cowboys will get the job done for Ontario.

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